LYON

Lyon is surprising to a first time visitor.  A prior viewing of French Food Safari, where Maeve met legendary Lyon chef Paul Bocuse*, led me to imagine it was on a flat plain, however our beautiful hotel is located high above the city close to Basilica Fourviere.  A funicular runs from the Basilica down to Vieux Lyon, but is not called a funicular by locals but chaine meaning string.  Given the elevation, we don't mind being stringed along.  Lyon is divided by the rivers Rhone and Saone but is said to possess another river as a byproduct of the consumption of bougelaise.

There are 250 historically listed buildings in Lyon, many located around Place Bellecore which is the largest square in Europe.  It is the place to shop with Lindt, Zara, McDonalds and Monoprix paying the premium rentals.  I contributed to the economy by purchasing two chardonnays and a tube of shaving creme for sensitive skin.

We invested in two tickets for the Lyon City bus tour, as we have already achieved our 10,000 steps and don't want to show you up (dear reader).  Enroute we passed yet another fine fountain designed by the same artist responsible for the Statue of Liberty.  Originally draughted for erection in the city of Bordeau, the artist grew tired of that cities' farnarkling and opted instead for Lyons' franc.

Located on the Saone, a futuristic orange cube resembling a facet of Star Wars' Death Star, and the vivid green building housing Euronews television are in stark contrast to the historic buildings. This modern neighbourhood replete with cutting edge chic apartments is located on the site of the old customs wharves. Melbourne's Docklands don't compare.

*Despite departing this mortal coil, Paul Bocuse has retained his 3 Michelin stars for more than 50 years.